It’s Thursday night. My husband glances over at me as I sit reading.
“Everything is Perfect When You’re a Liar?” he reads from the front cover of my book, “What exactly are you learning about?” he asks, accusingly.
“It’s the new book by Kelly Oxford,” I giggle and turn the page. “Don’t worry; it’s actually about telling it like it is. You know, not sugar coating things.”
“Who’s Kelly Oxford?” my husband asks, innocently. I gasp and reluctantly put my book down: this requires action.
I spend the next twenty minutes educating him. “Kelly Oxford’s an internet sensation,” I explain animatedly, “She’s even been re-tweeted by Roger Ebert! And she’s from Alberta!” (Both me and my husband were born and raised in Calgary). I login to Twitter and show my husband a couple of Oxford’s most recent gems.
From April 25th:
There should be an app that plays the Mario Bros ‘Game Over’ theme when the guy who cuts you off in traffic eventually crashes.
And from April 22nd:
If you don’t look like you’re about to barf while you workout, you’re dead to me.
Oxford’s new book, Everything is Perfect When You’re a Liar, is organized as a series of humorous vignettes covering Oxford’s life thus far. We are first introduced to a 6-year-old Oxford as she attempts to organize the neighborhood kids in a re-enactment of Star Wars. We then follow Oxford’s unique journey to adulthood with stops in Los Angeles where a teenaged Oxford searches for her soul mate (Leonardo Dicaprio, of course), and Hornby Island where Oxford commits what she refers to as her “Terrible Horrible.” Intrigued yet? You should be!
For those of you who know and love Oxford on Twitter, rest assured that there are plenty of characteristic Oxford witticisms peppered throughout this book. For those of you who don’t yet follow Oxford on Twitter, I expect that you will after you read this book. Everything is Perfect When You’re a Liar has just the right combination of sarcasm, wit, and hilarious one-liners. This book kept me thoroughly entertained: I could not put it down.
My favorite line? On page 164 Oxford writes, “Ninety percent of the time I’m listening to someone is spent wondering if my face looks interested enough.”
You gotta love it.